A Pox Upon Me

From now on I think instead of using vulgar language to emphasize my distaste for someone I'm going to say "a pox upon thee." Now I won't mean it in the tradition of the sixteenth century curse - which wished syphilis upon someone. I will mean it in more modern day terms. As in, I hope you get the chicken pox or some similar virus.

You see, I was diagnosed yesterday with such a condition. They can't say for sure if it is chicken pox or coxsackie virus - both are common childhood illnesses. The test to determine which would take weeks, if not months, because it would have to be sent to the state lab. Either way I should be better before we'd be able to get the test results and the treatment is mostly the same. If I end up in the hospital they'll rush the test and determine how best to proceed but until that time it's unnecessary. It's always a bright spot in the visit when the doctor suggests that your illness could involve a trip to the hospital. Why is it they never involve trips to Hawaii? I'd much rather possibly to go to Hawaii if my condition worsens than some hospital.

But, alas, I won't be going anywhere anytime soon. I'm highly contagious so I can't go out of the house. No grocery store, no Target, no trips to Starbucks for coffee. My Saturday has been a dismal day of bad television, naps, and medication. All the while trying hard not to scratch. I have a fever, an awful headache, a sore throat, and so many itchy, disgusting, did I say itchy, spots I lost count. What I don't have is enough anti-bodies to fight this disgusting virus but while I stay home they are supposed to accumulate. Although I look like someone quite unattractive I still have an overwhelming desire to leave the house. All because I am not allowed.

I think, given my current state, "a pox upon thee" is a better way of telling someone how distasteful I find them than any other phrase. Now if I could just find the person that cursed me!